Archive for career coaching

Priorities and promotions

I reveled in the promotion of two friends to general officer today. I worked with both of them in my past and knew they were destined for greatness. Partly because of skill and talent, partly because of the fate of assignments being at the right place at the right time, partly because of the mentoring of the people they worked with and worked for in the past. If that were the only reason for their promotions, though, they would be poor leaders. Both will be great leaders, not because of those things, but because they genuinely care about people and know how to balance their priorities.

They learned a long time ago not to let the urgent take the place of the important. They learned to think strategically. What does that mean in practical terms? It means they don’t let the calendar run them, they run the calendar. Important things like time for planning, time for family, time for themselves, time for vacation, time for staff, time for education, time for spiritual renewal, all get put on the calendar before they can get crowded out by the mundane activities of life. Generals’ calendars are unbelievably packed. They have little or no white space which is why these two women learned early to schedule the big things first. Put the important stuff on the calendar so it doesn’t get lost.

Another thing these two women understand is the importance of their network. They know hundreds of people, but more important, they know the circle of professionals they can count on in areas where they have weaknesses. All of us have a unique set of skills and all of us have weaknesses. When we know what they are, we can bring the right talent around us to partner with us to create an unstoppable team. That’s exactly what these two do so well. They know their strengths and weaknesses. They know how to build the right teams to take advantage of their strengths and partner with the right people to take advantage of others’ strengths. The important part of the partnership, though, is giving them credit. And they ALWAYS give credit to the team.

So as you see, their promotion to general officer is not an accident. Barb and Jimmie nurtured the five dimensions of their life throughout their careers. Congratulations are in order for what they have done in the past, for their bright futures, and for what the Army will gain because of their leadership in the future. They will coach a lot more young officers, non-commissioned officers, soldiers, and civilians over the next several years. Hopefully, many will learn the lessons of balance, setting the right priorities, and thinking strategically from them.

Congrats again to the AMEDD’s newest generals.


Spiritual Dimension Is the Core of Who We Are

The spiritual dimension of life reflects who we are deep inside. When we ignore the development of our spiritual dimension, we risk floating the latest fad, poll, and survey on the street and never stand for anything. We never understand our purpose in life and float aimlessly, unfulfilled, and probably very unhappy with who we are and what we accomplish. The spiritual dimension presents us with our moral compass, our values, a sense of purpose greater than ourselves. It gives us hope and helps us realize there is always something we can do in the face of adversity.

Spiritual Dimension and purposepurpose of life, spiritual dimension

One of the more interesting things about each of us resides in the genetic code that makes us unique. Although we are similar in so many ways, no two of us are exactly alike. If you think about the combinations and permutations of genes that exist in us, you begin to realize it’s the virtually impossible odds of two people being alike. If that is true, and forensic science bases itself on that fact, consider the likelihood that two people have the exact combination of skills, talents, intelligence, experience, and so forth. Again, the odds are virtually impossible. If for no other reason, the physiological differences between us make us respond to environmental factors with slight differences.

If we are all different, then we all fit different roles and responsibilities better. As a Christian the spiritual dimension is where I think we find purpose in life. I believe we were created with a purpose in mind. When we figure out what that purpose is and pursue that purpose we will feel fulfilled in life. We will be happy in our chosen profession and know that we are doing what we were made to do. For those not of the Christian faith, the same argument still holds. If you know what your skills, talents, experience, desires are, not necessarily what makes the most money, using those attributes to the fullest brings exceptional satisfaction and fulfillment in life. Most often fulfillment comes from using those talents for the good of others because we are relational people.

How do you find your purpose?

So if finding your purpose is so important? Just how do you go about doing it?

There are some simple steps.

  • take an inventory of your skills and talents
  • ask yourself how you help people
  • list the resources you have available to help others
  • think about who you help

Put these lists where you can stare at them for a few days. Let some close friends, your spouse, and family members pick them apart, add to them, and change them around. Add a list of who help you help others. These will be your weaknesses, things you either don’t do well, or don’t like to do. Don’t limit your lists to your job site, make sure you think holistically. What do you do for your neighbors, your family, your church?

Figure out who you are and what excites you. You’ll probably see in the list of how you help and who you help a clear purpose for your life. You’ll see what really makes you happy in doing things for others. It may be in your current job, or it may be that your current job provides the means by which you’re able to do what you love. This simple exercise can work some wonders for you if you’ve never tried it before.

The spiritual dimension of life is all about finding your purpose and direction. If you’d like more information or more help in discovering your purpose in life, give me a call or email me. You can find out more about the packages available by clicking below.

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richard@ageesconsulting.com

(210) 854-3978

 


Clutter creates chaos

A cluttered desk, a cluttered room, a cluttered house, a cluttered life can all add stress to your life. Things get lost. Some people can live that way and it never bothers them. Most can not. You’ve probably flipped through the channels and seen “Hoarders” and been mesmerized by the piles and piles of stuff an individual can accumulate without really being aware of it. For those individuals, it’s a disease, an obsessive compulsive disorder. For most of us, we can let little things pile up, though, until it becomes an overwhelming distraction and we just don’t know where to start.

That’s the problem with my garage at the moment. I have a detached garage and it’s just too easy to shovel out the stuff from the car and put it on the closest thing at waist level before pulling out for a last-minute departure. The problem is when I return, I fail to recover the junk I left behind and instead just close the door…out of sight, out of mind. So now…remember the “Hoarder” scene? It’s not quite that bad, but…

What the garage does to me, though, is keep a small nagging voice in the back of my head that continually say, “Richard, you need to clean up the junk! You need to clean up the junk! You need to clean…” But Texas is hot. There are a million other things I’d rather do than clean up the clutter. I know my back will hurt when I’m finished because of age-old injuries. I’m embarrassed to hire someone to do it for me because it’s gotten so out of hand. But the voice keeps calling, “You need to clean out the junk! You need to…”

Fixingcluttered-garage1 the clutter problem

As a life coach I know what physical and mental clutter does to a person. So, it’s time to get after it. But I also know that if I try to tackle it all at once, I won’t make it. Physically because of previous injuries, I’ll end up not moving for several days if I tackle the task all at once. I know that about my physical capabilities. That must go into the planning risks. I also know about how long it will take me to get the job done based on the square footage of the space and the length of time it take per square foot from a short experiment earlier.

So I can free myself of the physical clutter and the mental clutter by getting the task into my calendar, making it an appointment like every other appointment I make and sticking to it. It is hot in Texas, but not so hot at six in the morning. I just need to handle the task as my morning exercise. It may not work all the same muscle groups, but that’s okay. An hour of cleaning up that mess will probably do as much or more with different muscle groups and takes care of two tasks at once. I don’t even have to worry about getting wet during workouts since I’ll be inside!

That takes care of the pile. Then it’s building the habit of removing the stuff when I get out of the car, not before I get into the car. 21 days! That’s what the psychiatric world says it takes to build a habit. So I’ll put a sticky on my door, on my steering wheel, on the console to remind me I’m building a habit. After 21 days of doing the right thing…voila! I’m on the path to a clutter free garage and no more voices in the back of my brain.

Your garage may not look like mine. Maybe it’s your Fibber Maggee’s closet (okay, some of you are too young to understand). Maybe it’s your desk or your sock drawer. Whatever the cluttered part of your life, you can fix it. A life coach can give you some tips and techniques and help hold you accountable.


A Life Coach Can Help Bring Joy Back to You

child playingI visited a church other than my own the other day for a special celebration. We celebrated the life of a young lady who fell victim to leukemia far too soon. She lived more in nine years and touched more people with her enthusiasm and passion than most do in a lifetime. Perhaps I’ll write more about her in another post. But today I want to talk about a particular impact the service made on me by watching one individual. This wasn’t behavior taught by a life coach, but inherent joy demonstrated by one person!

One young man in particular in the worship service caught my eye. He had some developmental problems, but I couldn’t help but see the pure joy with which he lived life. The music lifted him in a way I can hardly describe. You could see the young man’s family and friends loved him and accepted his handicap, but as we sang, pure joy just exploded across his face and through his whole frame. What a way to live. Look around and you’ll see it in children. As they play, children express unbridled joy. They laugh, they sing, they dance, they just enjoy life.

Have you lost that joy? Have you become so encumbered with the stresses of life that you’ve forgotten how to laugh? Have you let the unimportant or the urgent get in the way of real life and lost the purpose of being? A life coach can help you find it again. That’s what they are all about. Helping you find purpose, balance, tools and techniques to cope with the stresses that rob you of the joy of living.

I’ll admit, even as a life coach, I sometimes get caught up in the crush of life, but I’ve learned through the years most of the things we seems to worry and stress over aren’t worth it. I’ll share my 95% rule with you. “95% of everything that happens to you today or that you do today doesn’t matter. No one cares about it or will remember it tomorrow. So why stress over it. So figure out the important 5% and do it well.”

So what’s the 5%? I’ve found it usually, normally, most of the time has to do with relationships between you and God or you and someone else. Nothing else really matters. I’ll be honest with you that 30 years ago, this was an 80% rule. As I’ve matured, it has become a 95% rule. I expect in another 10 years it might progress to a 99% rule.

Relationships seem incredibly important! Take care of them. That doesn’t mean always compromise or coddle. It means take care of them. Relationships are where you’ll find real joy. You’ll also find real sorrow and real stress there. You’ll find yourself vulnerable in relationships. But without relationships, you’ll have a hard time finding the unbridled joy you find in children.

Take a look at the five dimensions of a balanced life depicted on the “Life Balance” page of my website and you’ll understand how relationships are such a vital part of life. They weave in and out of every dimension because we are social creatures. As much as some people would like to think they could live forever in a cave by themselves, hermits just can’t survive long. We need each other. We need relationships and healthy social interaction for a joy-filled life. A life coach understands those relationship needs and can help you navigate them.

What’s your opinion?

How do you bring joy back to into your life?

What do you do to make sure you laugh every day?

Richard