Author Archive for Richard – Page 7

A Life Coach Can Help Bring Joy Back to You

child playingI visited a church other than my own the other day for a special celebration. We celebrated the life of a young lady who fell victim to leukemia far too soon. She lived more in nine years and touched more people with her enthusiasm and passion than most do in a lifetime. Perhaps I’ll write more about her in another post. But today I want to talk about a particular impact the service made on me by watching one individual. This wasn’t behavior taught by a life coach, but inherent joy demonstrated by one person!

One young man in particular in the worship service caught my eye. He had some developmental problems, but I couldn’t help but see the pure joy with which he lived life. The music lifted him in a way I can hardly describe. You could see the young man’s family and friends loved him and accepted his handicap, but as we sang, pure joy just exploded across his face and through his whole frame. What a way to live. Look around and you’ll see it in children. As they play, children express unbridled joy. They laugh, they sing, they dance, they just enjoy life.

Have you lost that joy? Have you become so encumbered with the stresses of life that you’ve forgotten how to laugh? Have you let the unimportant or the urgent get in the way of real life and lost the purpose of being? A life coach can help you find it again. That’s what they are all about. Helping you find purpose, balance, tools and techniques to cope with the stresses that rob you of the joy of living.

I’ll admit, even as a life coach, I sometimes get caught up in the crush of life, but I’ve learned through the years most of the things we seems to worry and stress over aren’t worth it. I’ll share my 95% rule with you. “95% of everything that happens to you today or that you do today doesn’t matter. No one cares about it or will remember it tomorrow. So why stress over it. So figure out the important 5% and do it well.”

So what’s the 5%? I’ve found it usually, normally, most of the time has to do with relationships between you and God or you and someone else. Nothing else really matters. I’ll be honest with you that 30 years ago, this was an 80% rule. As I’ve matured, it has become a 95% rule. I expect in another 10 years it might progress to a 99% rule.

Relationships seem incredibly important! Take care of them. That doesn’t mean always compromise or coddle. It means take care of them. Relationships are where you’ll find real joy. You’ll also find real sorrow and real stress there. You’ll find yourself vulnerable in relationships. But without relationships, you’ll have a hard time finding the unbridled joy you find in children.

Take a look at the five dimensions of a balanced life depicted on the “Life Balance” page of my website and you’ll understand how relationships are such a vital part of life. They weave in and out of every dimension because we are social creatures. As much as some people would like to think they could live forever in a cave by themselves, hermits just can’t survive long. We need each other. We need relationships and healthy social interaction for a joy-filled life. A life coach understands those relationship needs and can help you navigate them.

What’s your opinion?

How do you bring joy back to into your life?

What do you do to make sure you laugh every day?

Richard


Life in the fast lane

The older I get the faster time seems to move. I used to have a theory about it that time was just a perception based on your age. A year to a two-year old is a long time, 50% of their life. Now, pushing the big six-oh, a year is less than 2% of the span that I can draw from in my memories. Of course, that assumes I can remember anything longer than what I ate for breakfast. Now I’m not so sure about my theory anymore. I’m beginning to think time does slip away faster than it did ten years ago. So what does this have to do with a life coach?

I think time moves fast because we have things so turned around. We somehow got the impression that a productive calendar means no white space left on them. I fell into the trap. It took my wife and kids continually reminding me, disease processes, and hitting the magic 30 years in the Army to finally figure out I was way out of balance. I’m hoping I can share through this blog and a new career path a better way of living for some who head down that same dead-end before it is too late.

So what does a life coach do and what do I mean by balance in your life? In other parts of this website you can explore some of the aspects of balance. You can see my credentials in the About Me page, but the model the Army uses with its five dimensions of physical, family, spiritual, emotional, and social wellness are pretty good starting places. If you’re not looking out for yourself in all of them, you’re out of balance. A life coach will help you assess yourself in each of these areas and see how you’re faring. They will help you set goals to balance those areas and action plans to achieve those goals.

Remember, though, life coaches are not magicians. Like an athletic coach, they will point you in the right direction, but you must expect to do the work. Kobe Bryant has a shooting coach. His shooting coach seldom breaks a sweat, but has propelled Kobe as one of the best scorers in the NBA. Likewise, Mickey Mantle had a batting coach. Unfortunately, what he didn’t have, was a life coach he would listen to.

So how do you manage to balance your life? What are your secrets to getting everything done in a world that pushes for every minute filled with activity? What are your goals in each of the five dimensions – physical, family, spiritual, emotional, social?